Week 14 NFL Fearless Free Picks
The Week 14 odds and lines are here, and it’s time to make up for the losses that Philadelphia and the New York Jets suckered you in to. If the Thanksgiving sports betting weekend taught us anything, it’s that we still know very little about this NFL betting season. It’s been a crazy year, but Week 14 should make things a bit easier on the betting maniacs out there. Let’s get to the preview!
SAN DIEGO CHARGERS -10.5 over The Cable Guy
The Thursday night football matchup pits two horrifically underachieving AFC West teams against each other. The Raiders have gone 5-7 ATS while the pitiful Chargers lost any chance of the Wildcard with an underwhelming loss to Michael Turner and the Falcons from Atlanta. The Chargers should turn up the heat at home, especially with Oakland coming to town. The Chargers are 10-1 ATS in their last 11 meetings with those committed to excellence. Oh, and by “excellence” I’m pretty sure Al Davis is referring to the, “unbending diligence towards crapping the bed”.
ATLANTA FALCONS +3.5 over New Orleans Saints
The Saints went from a defying win over Green Bay, to a loss to Tampa. The chances of them making the playoffs stand at slim-to-none, but they can put a dent in Atlanta’s upstart chances. The truth is that Green Bay lost to the Saints because Aaron Rodgers chalked up one of “those games”. Don’t expect Matt Ryan to do the same, especially with Michael Turner piercing through a Saints rushing defense.
TENNESSEE TITANS -14.5 over Cleveland Browns
Ken Dorsey’s back! Yaaaaaay!
DEFENDING SUPERBOWL CHAMPS -7.5 over Andy Reid’s Ineptitude
Why can’t the oddsmakers get this right? The Eagles were stomped by the Giants the last time they met, holding possession of the ball three times longer than the hapless Eagles. Are we supposed to think McNabb is on an FU tour or something? Give me a break.
Cincinnati Bengals +14.5 over INDINAPOLIS COLTS
Honestly, where the hell did this spread come from? Do you really expect the Colts, who are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 home games, to cover double digits. I don’t care if the Bengals suck that much. They don’t suck that bad…do they?
CHICAGO BEARS over Jacksonville Jaguars
Not sure where this line is going to end up, but the Bears are definitively much better than the Jaguars, who just posted a humiliating loss to the freaking Texans. Chicago is 5-2 SU in their last 7 home games and nothing in Jacksonville is keeping me inspired about the Jaguars. I got off this betting bandwagon before the season even started. Why haven’t you?
GREEN BAY PACKERS over Houston Texans
See what happens when Sage bets on his own team? He plays better! Ok, just kidding (kind of). The Texans are in letdown game made after beating up on the Jaguars. Now they have to travel to the frigid territory of Wisconsin to play against the Packers. Green Bay is coming off two brutal losses to Carolina and New Orleans and is due to bounce back against the Texans and Sage Rosenfels.
Minnesota Vikings -9.5 over DETROIT SUCKFEST
Can we create a bailout plan for the Lions? Can the NFL owners just swoop in and coddle these toothless kings of the jungle? It’s just getting sad. Minnesota is 5-1-1 ATS in their last 7 against Detroit, and the last time they played Jared Allen chased Dan Orlovsky out of the endzone causing a safety. Yeesh.
MIAMI DOLPHINS +1 over Buffalo Bills
It actually pains me to say this, but Miami is coming together at the right time. I think the cold weather affect has less of an impact because of Chad Pennington’s time in New York. With Devon Bess emerging out of Miami, I think the Dolphins have a case to make a nice run. They need a desperate win over Buffalo, and in this case I love the road dogs with a point.
Chiefs vs. Broncos over THE FANS
Holy crap what a bad division. I’m so sick of writing about the stupid AFC West. Remember when we cared about these teams? What happened to those days? I don’t know…the Broncos just came off a huge win against New York and are playing at home. But Tyler Thigpen’s last name is so hilariously awkward and Denver’s defense stands to get blown apart by Larry Johnson. What was that? He’s not dominating anymore? Oh well then never mind. Broncos by a billion then!
New York Jets -3.5 over SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS
Poor Jets fans. The “Yes We Can!” attitude went flying out the window after a nice winning streak was capped by a loss to Denver. Still a 4-1 ATS streak is enough for me to believe the Jets return to the headlines with a definitive win over Singletary’s pants.
Angry Belichik -4.5 over DEFEATED MIKE HOLMGREN
Holmgren checked out of this season seven weeks ago, and nobody noticed. I don’t even think the Walrus gives two damns about football anymore. You know who does? Matt Cassel’s agent! While this game is a wash since the Blowhawks are 1-3-1 ATS in their last 5 games, I will say that I can’t wait to see what the Patriots do with Cassel. He’s going to be the best player turned in to a third round pick of all time.
ARIZONA CARDINALS -13.5 over Marc Bulger’s Can-Do Attitude!
What do the Rams do at this point? Do they just prepare for 2012 and start targeting high school prospects? Do they clear house and restart, or just find some offensive line that can keep Marc Bulger from eating turf burgers all the time? You know who Bulger reminds me of at this point? David Carr. Yeah, I said it. He doesn’t even look like he’s enjoying life anymore. Screw that. You could pay me $50 a day to get chased around by men three times my size who are trying to pull my spleen out through my mouth and I’d still be loving life! “Yes! Fifty bucks!”
Dallas Cowboys +3 over PITTSBURGH STEELERS
This is all contingent on Dallas’s Marion Barber and DeMarcus Ware coming back to play, which I’m assuming they will. This is the thing about the Steelers – when you first look at this line, it looks favorable for Pittsburgh. Then you realize that they’re 1-4 ATS at home thus far and they’ve let you down every time you build steam on them. I’m not biting this time.
BALTIMORE RAVENS over Washington Redskins
The Redskins have looked morbid for the last three weeks, and I love everything I’m seeing out of Baltimore. From a stiff defense to a passing game and rushing game that make this team look unstoppable when they’re both clicking, this team has a lot of promise. The biggest problem is getting the passing game and rushing game to click at the same time…
Tampa Bay Buccaneers over CAROLINA PANTHERS
Has the line between two NFC South teams been higher than four this season? This game is deserving of the Monday Night Spotlight for two reasons. It will give us a really good look on how badly the Panthers defense has fallen apart (61 points in the last two games), and if Jake’s elbow is up to snuff.
But I’m more excited to see Tampa’s Cadillac hit the ground running. The Auburn Tiger stormed in a touchdown, and seeks revenge after the Panthers put him on the shelf for over a year. A win here could cement the Bucs stranglehold over the NFC South. And you know how big of a fan I am of strangle holds. Goozle!
